Rebuilding Your Business After Burnout Without Starting Over With Fibromyalgia | Dr. Alicia Newsome

There's a special kind of exhaustion that comes from doing exactly what you were told to do and watching your body collapse under the weight of trying to do it.

You followed the strategy.

You ran the webinars back to back, you took the calls back to back.

And hey, you made the money.

And somewhere along the way, you started to hate the thing you were building.

Not because you weren't good at it, but because it was literally starting to break the very essence of who you are and what you want it to be.

Maybe you've been there on back to back calls, having a full calendar and having a profitable business on paper, but your body's begging you to stop.

Dr. Alicia Newsom is a functional medicine doctor, an entrepreneur who's built businesses in consulting, Service, and now B2C and B2B Wellness.

She knows what it's like to build something profitable that costs more than it pays physically, emotionally and relationally.

Here's what nobody tells us.

The coaches or the gurus who promise you can make a million dollars working two days a week aren't lying about the revenue.

They're actually not telling you about how little rest they're actually getting.

Because mimicking someone else's success means mimicking their capacity, their life, their nervous system.

And if those don't match yours, you end up with a business that works and a body that's saying, I can't do it any longer.

In this episode, Dr. Alicia shares what it felt like to run a live webinar while sick with COVID at seven months pregnant.

I cannot believe this.

Why she spent years trying to solve the sales call bottleneck that every coach told her she was just going to have to overcome with mindset and how she finally built a asynchronous model that lets her clients move at their own pace and lets her breathe.

You'll hear how she reconnected to what was true for her and what it costs to keep saying yes when she wanted to say no.

And lastly, the one question that changed how she hires coaches.

Now.

If you've ever built something, you can't afford to keep running the way you have been, this episode will give you the permission to build differently.

If you want to continue this conversation with us in a more intimate way, be sure to join us in our community where you can find the link to that in our show notes.

In the meantime, stay tuned as we jump into this conversation.

Are you tired of hearing business advice that completely ignores what real life looks like when you're navigating chronic illness, autoimmune disorders flare ups, medical appointments and just life.

Lifing Business with Chronic Illness is for entrepreneurs who know they're capable of building something meaningful but need a way to do it that actually works with their body, not against it.

This podcast brings you honest conversations with founders, CEOs and other bosses, sharing their strategies, adaptations and lessons they've learned while building businesses alongside chronic illness, including what worked, what didn't, and what they wish they had done differently before burnout forced the lesson.

I'm your host, Nikita Williams, a globally ranked podcast host and entrepreneur who's built my business while navigating chronic illness and helping others do the same without sacrificing themselves.

I created this show to open up the conversations most business spaces avoid.

The promise of Business with Chronic Illness is simple to show you that you can build a thriving business with chronic illness and autoimmune disorders without sacrificing your health, your peace, or your profit.

You're not behind, you're building differently and you're in the right place.

Hey everybody.

I am so excited that you're here.

We're going to be talking to Dr. Alicia Newsom.

We are going to be talking about burnout post.

Like obviously we're going to talk about what that looks like, going through what it looks like in your personal life and how did that translate.

But also now that we're kind of past it, and I always say that it's not really past it, but there's residual healing from it.

What does it mean?

What does it mean in your life?

But before we get into that, I'd love for you to tell us a little bit about you, your story, a bit where you're from so we all can get to know you a little bit.

Yeah, so I'm from Kansas City, Kansas, the Kansas side.

There's a Kansas and there's a Missouri.

I'm from the Kansas side.

And then I spent the majority of my adult life in the south.

So I went to undergrad in Tennessee and then I went to school in Atlanta and I lived there for over a decade and then now I live on the west coast, so I've had a bit of living all over and I have been an entrepreneur for pretty much all of my adult life.

So I've had several different businesses.

Some were consulting, some were service based and now I have a business.

I have two lanes that I operate in.

One is B2C where I'm working with women struggling with hormonal imbalances, helping them find out exactly what's going on inside of their Body.

Everything that I do is without drugs or surgery.

And then the other lane is where I work B2B, either with people through my integrated leadership framework where we're focusing on business, how you're running your business so you don't end up burnt out and then body and then belief.

And then also we work with people in their teams as well too, doing corporate wellness.

I love that it is such an important both aspects of this.

When we first met and started talking, I was sharing with you.

I'm like, I wish we had more of you, more of us in the space, especially in the corporate world because it's very siloed.

Like the medical world in general, especially here in the States is very siloed.

Where that relationship between your well being and your mental and physical well being, I think it's getting better.

But still we have these systemic issues that we see around.

What does that mean?

Especially as an entrepreneur, I feel like entrepreneurship just took that on too.

We just dressed it up.

We just dressed it up to make.

It seem like we said we'll leave corporate and then we'll just work for ourselves and then work really, really hard.

Yeah, we created our own corporate entrepreneurial ladder in a way.

So for you in your journey, I know as a functional medicine doctor as well, turned to multiple different angles of your business.

I know we talk about burnout so much.

We know the clinical definition.

How would you define it?

From your work, working with yourself and with your clients.

Like, what is burnout?

Beyond the clinical definition of that really.

It's when you find yourself like pushing through.

You know, for me, from like a physical standpoint, it's fatigue, tiredness, trouble focusing.

You might be at a place where you don't even want to make decisions at the end of the day or during the day.

You're just like, I can't do anymore.

You might find yourself looping a lot where now you used to have a time in life where you felt a lot of clarity and, and momentum and now it's like I don't even know what to do.

You might start something, stop something, start something else, start something.

Doing a lot of back and forth with that.

And then there's just like the complete exhaustion piece, you know, where you are just tired all the time.

Midday, afternoon, you need coffee, falling asleep on the couch in the evenings or on the weekends and all of those different types of things, I think.

But burnout though has a big mental well being component though, in addition to like how we feel physically.

So true.

I was on an episode with someone, and they said it's a level of disconnection.

And I thought it was a powerful.

I was like, oh, that's so powerful.

Because you're.

I don't know if you experienced this, Alicia, but in your journey, have you found, like, oh, actually, I could probably name where it really started to unravel because I was completely disconnected or I was completely just rolling with the motions.

Yes.

For me, rest is such a important component to preventing burnout.

But rest comes in different forms.

You know, it's not just physical rest.

I need a nap.

We definitely need to make sure that we're sleeping, we're getting good rest.

Rest at night, you know, getting into deep REM sleep, getting seven to nine hours, depending on your body and who you are.

But sometimes we need sensory rest where it's like, I've been behind a computer all day.

Or maybe you work somewhere where there's lots of lights or music or something that's buzzing all the time.

Right.

We need sensory rest.

Sometimes we may need emotional rest where we have unprocessed grand grief or pain that's, you know, we're carrying around that's pulling us down and we're tired.

Sometimes we need soulful rest.

You know, rest for our soul, for our spirit, where we do feel disconnected from our maker and we may need to get out in nature to reconnect.

So I love that how you gave that example of, like, reconnection.

It's all just, to me, reconnecting mind, body, and soul when we rest.

And, yeah, when we're burnt out, we don't feel connected.

Now, how did that look like in your story?

How did experiencing burnout, or how have you seen that experience with your clients where it's like, this is what's going on.

And you're like, ooh, here it is.

You know, what does that look like?

To be honest, I've had a few times in my life where I burnt myself out, kind of burnt things to the ground and was pushing through.

But with my current business, and I think with all my businesses, I've done this.

It's okay.

They're so shame.

We all have, you know, we all do it.

Yes.

With this business, I used to run webinars, and I would run them every single week.

And then on that webinar, I would do a sales call, or, like, my call to action was a sales call, and it was like, 1 97.

And then I had all these calls on my calendar, and I was, like, running them weekly.

But then I just started with my Coach.

And this is what they told me to do.

So I started going, and I was like, wait, this isn't sustainable.

You know, like, I can't stay on all these calls.

And then I have fulfillment on the back end, right?

So then now I'm selling them coaching programs, and then I'm working with people one on one.

So I started to create a business for myself where it was like, yeah, I'm making good money, right?

But I began to hate it because I was tied to my desk all the time.

And then I'm on calls.

And for me, working with women, dealing with health issues, it's a heavy topic.

A lot of times women, it's a very safe space for them.

So they're crying on the calls, you know, and while I have the tools to be able to hold that space and do all of that, it pulled a lot from me, like, emotionally and at the end of the day.

And then I got pregnant, so then I was pregnant, and I'm, like, just grinding, going.

I'm running my webinars at nighttime.

I'm taking calls all throughout the day, doing all that.

And then I tried to hire a sales team.

That was a whole different ball game, because now I'm coaching salespeople on, like, their belief system and their mind and, you know, all of these things.

And I hit this point where I got.

Ended up getting Covid.

I was seven months pregnant, and I was really sick, and I had a webinar scheduled, and I'm, like, grabbing my computer in the bed, and I'm, like, trying to set it up.

It's a live webinar.

I'm pulling a recording.

So then I'm, like, playing that when everybody gets on, so then it looks like it's live.

And then the next day, my salesperson is crying on the phone to me, and, you know, all of this stuff.

And I was like, I can't sustain this.

You know, I'm about to have.

Give birth and give, you know, have a baby.

And I feel like I hit, like, a point.

Like, I probably should have slowed down much sooner.

And I continued, and then I had my baby.

But then it just kind of collapsed from there.

It was like, I knew I couldn't keep doing what I was doing, but then I was like, I don't know what else to do.

Do you know?

Like, I don't know how to build this business in a way that's sustainable.

And I feel like I then had, like, burnout mind after that.

It was like I would try different things, and then that Wouldn't work and I'm trying something else.

And it was like, I'm always thinking non stop about how to like fix this bottleneck problem, you know, like, how do, how do I get myself out of the position of being the salesperson because I've got to handle fulfillment and then I hire a coach, you know, to help me.

So it really became more like a mental burnout for me in my mind to process through that.

And then I had my baby.

I think I ended up having like three weeks.

And then I needed to talk, you know, my clients had calls booked, he, he came late.

So I tried to give myself five weeks.

But I have great clients so, you know, they were patient with me and everything like that.

But it took me a while to recover from that because I feel like I trusted so, so many coaches too.

I paid so much money, you know, I believed all the marketing hype.

Like if you just do this, then you're going to make a million dollars working two days a week.

It's just not the case.

Right.

So from there I've been able to build a business that is sustainable and one that does not pull on my health, my mental well being, my marriage, my time with my kids, all of those different types of things and still be able to be profitable.

I think it's always those webinars.

Like I, like, I feel like it's always those webinars.

I have heard this story before, but I'm actually, I'm really curious.

In that space of I'm doing this, the coach said do this, Whoever said do this, I'm doing it, I'm showing up, I'm doing it, I'm making the money, all of that.

In any of that space, do you go back to whoever's telling you this and being like, I feel like this is not working and what is the response back to you in that space?

You know, I've had a couple different responses.

So my very first coach, I, I told them this is not working.

But I also told them they lied in their marketing.

It's not even mathematically possible to do what, you know, they recommended.

And they actually changed their marketing.

They were really high integrity.

That was a good experience.

And I would say that's more rare though.

A lot of the other coaches and things that I've hired, they always just try to like, well, no, you just got to do it.

You just gotta, you know, push through.

And so I've always tried to figure out how to have a business without sales calls.

That's been my biggest bottleneck my biggest hang up for many years and I would hire coaches and then at the, you know, I tell them this in the beginning, like I don't want to do that.

And everyone's just like mentally tries to like make it okay for me, you know, like, it's a mental thing that I've got to fix.

Right.

Like it's something within me that needs to feel okay doing something that I actually don't want to do.

And I find with myself that I thrive much better when I do what's in alignment for me.

And when I first started out, I've had coaches for decades.

Every business that I've had, I always hire a coach.

I think it's a great thing to do.

And I feel like this online coaching industries very different than brick and mortar and things that I've done before.

There's just a lot of shirks out there and things where I was a little naive and just believe like, well, if I just do what they tell me to do, I'm going to be successful.

But what I didn't realize is that I'm mimicking their success.

So yeah, I was successful on paper previously.

Right.

But it wasn't good for my body, it wasn't good for my mental well being.

So I've been mindful about hiring coaches that actually have lives that I want to mimic.

You actually have a good marriage.

You're healthy, you're not consumed with work.

Because they, in all honesty, can't teach me to do what they're not able to do themselves.

That's so interesting that you said it, that you asked them the question.

They changed the thing.

Like they changed how they're saying you can do the thing.

Did that change in you how you could do the thing?

Like, did that change in you and be like, oh, okay, so they changed their marketing.

So I need to now change the way I approach this.

Did that shift in your brain at all or was it like, no, I just, I've committed.

I think this is what happens.

I've committed and I'm doing it with the live webinar training.

Like that sales call.

Well, I stopped.

I stopped actually for a couple years and I was just like, I'm not doing.

I'm going to figure out a different way.

Until I did.

So I ended up finding another way to do business in a way that really aligns for me and it doesn't include sales calls anymore.

It actually aligns better for my clientele too because for instance, do you need another meeting on your calendar?

Most people don't know.

No, no.

So now what I do is I do a lot of one on one work, but.

But it's asynchronous.

So even with my intake process, women complete all my intake forms.

There's hundreds of questions because in functional medicine, we're extremely thorough.

So I ask all of these questions, but you're dropped into a one on one portal with me.

And have you ever been at the doctor and you're like, oh, I wish I would have told her this.

Well, this system allows them to do this.

You know, you'd be able to fill out your paperwork and then you, you can video, send me a video, a text message, you know, a voice memo and say, oh, yeah, and I want you to think about this too.

So from there I just put together everyone's plan on exactly like what I'm seeing with their lab work, their health history, what supplements they need, nutrition, lifestyle, and then it's truly done in a do it yourself fashion with integrity.

Like they can take the plan and actually implement it themselves, or I offer them the opportunity to continue working with me going forward.

But it's all super transparent.

But it took me years to figure that out.

It is so interesting, like you mentioned that during that process you had your child.

It sounds like you were like healing this aspect of your everything.

Like, what did that look like?

Because you probably extended all the capacity and energy that you eat even had then you had a child.

That alone to me is like, oh my God, like you had a child.

A little traumatic.

Like when I look back at it, like, what was I doing to myself?

Yeah.

And so when you decided to shift things, what did that process feel like for you to shift out of that or like heal that?

What did that look like for you?

It's interesting that at the beginning of this you talked about that reconnection piece and that's what it's all been around.

And I didn't have words for that until you said it.

But really reconnecting to what's true for me, I'm very coachable, so I'm, I've always been willing to do the things, but I had to really reconnect to what was true for me, what felt like it was an integrity with the way that I do business and with the way that I show up for clients and what I'm saying yes to in different areas of my life.

So with that I was saying, you know, I wasn't just running a business, I'm saying yes in all kinds of areas of my life where I Probably want to say no.

So that has been a big part of me, like, coming back to me and reconnecting, and it's a big strategy for me and avoiding burnout, because as long as I'm saying yes to things that I want to say no to, it ends up leaving me frustrated.

I'm tired, and it doesn't work for anyone that's involved.

I have experienced burnout more so living with chronic illness from the angle living with chronic illness than my business.

Because when I started my business, I was like, I cannot afford to burn out because of business.

Like, I.

For me, I was like, I cannot.

I don't have the spoons to, like, sacrifice sleep.

I have to, or I'm dead.

Like, these were kind of like my things.

But I have experienced that place of disconnection in trying to heal or fix or move through my chronic illnesses where I literally get to a point where I'm, like, looking at a list of all of the doctors, things I need to do, or these appointments or these supplements.

And I'm looking at it, and it looks like a blur.

And I'm tired and I'm exhausted, and I've gone through that in my life.

I personally have had the same thing I need to reconnect to, like, just slowing down instead of being in a hurry, trying to get this part of the hard stuff done and realize this is just going to be a part of it.

You know, it's like laundry.

It never ends.

So, like, my therapist has said this to me all the time.

She's like, there is no end to laundry.

There's none.

There is no end to laundry at all.

And I've.

And I've learned that with business, too.

Like, the to do list, it doesn't end.

It will still be there tomorrow.

You know, the things to do, the strategies, all the things, it's just there.

And the more that we accept that, the easier things become.

Yeah.

I wonder for you in your healing, you said you, You.

You shared that you've gone through this a couple of different times, and as you've gone through burnout a couple different times, what are some learnings that have come out of each of those things that you're like, I need to keep.

Hold on to this, or are they the same learnings?

You know, that's a good question there, because I do think we keep learning the same things until we actually learn that, you know.

Yes.

Yeah, we keep having those lessons over and over.

My biggest things have been learning to trust myself.

It's also been learning to Ask for help.

That's been a big thing.

And that's also believing that I'm worthy of receiving help, that people will actually show up for me when I ask.

I had a lot of things, deep rooted wounds that had me believe.

I'm always alone.

People always leave me.

I got to do everything by myself, you know, I got to handle everything.

I'm the glue that holds it together.

And it's not the truth.

You know, there's a lot of good people in the world and in our lives there are, you know, and sometimes it takes a bit of shifting through.

Just like when you're dating.

Right.

Like every guy ain't for you, right?

Yes.

It's the same way in business when you hire people on your team or, you know, in friendship as well, you got to shift a little bit.

And when you have those good people that show up for you, like you show up for them, you.

You hold on to them and you allow yourself to be vulnerable as well.

If we're just walking around with this mask on that we've got it all together, or we don't really let people all the way in, like we let them know there's something going on, but then we stop them.

We're really hindering ourselves from experiencing true connection with other people.

And I really think that's a big part of life.

Like, we're here to connect with other human beings, to experience life together and just journey together.

So that's been a big part in each one of my instances of burnout.

That's been really big.

Yeah.

I wonder, like from a medical research if you have the data, because I hear it from the conversations I have on the show where that the disconnect often for many of the women that are on the show who are sharing, they have chronic illness, have burnt out, or have some type of something, is this idea of disconnection and not the lack of asking for help, the lack of self trust to an extent has like a deep correlation in the stories I hear.

I'm wondering, in your experience as a physician and also in leadership spaces, are you seeing that to be the case as well, with how they're disconnected from, like, other things that are important about how they function in life?

100% That may also be.

We tend to attract people that have similar paths as us or people that were called to help?

You know, we've journeyed down that road first, so I might be a little skewed, but we live in this culture that worships exhaustion and we get that pat on the back and you know, if you're.

You're the superwoman who still showed up despite everything else going on.

It's a cultural phenomenon that's going on.

You know that it's like, how are you doing?

I'm tired, I'm busy.

It's a thing to push through.

So I would say there's a big segment of women, and especially entrepreneurial women or professional women, who are lacking that trust within themselves.

Because when we trust others, you know, we have to trust ourselves first.

So there's that piece and that worthiness piece.

Or not feeling like we're enough, like it's a big thing.

Yeah.

In the season of healing through burnout, like healing from burnout, resetting, re claiming, redefining all of that.

What are some things you have found to be absolutely crucial for you?

And then we'll kind of scope out for, like, clients and how that works fundamentally.

But what has been some of the things of, like, I have to have this to do this or not to do this.

Like, what does that look like?

Because I think we all hear about burning out, what it looks like, what it feels like, but then it's like, okay, so once you're there, what does, like, healing, recouping, like, what has to change?

It can't just be more sleep.

Like, it has to be so much more than just more sleep.

There are very specific things that are non negotiables for me.

I know we're saying it's not just sleep, but sleep is one of them.

I'm like you.

I have to have it.

I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia when I was 20 years old.

You know, so it's always been something like my health is always.

I don't want to say it's been more fragile, but it's something that I feel like.

And maybe I'm just more aware of it from all of the years, but I have to be very mindful of that.

Like, sleep is extremely important.

And then there's things that I need to make sure that I'm doing for my mental well being.

And there's morning routines, evening routines, and then weekly routines that I have to keep my life flowing in a way.

So morning routines would be in the morning.

There's something that I always do.

I practice gratitude.

So I write down five things that I'm grateful for.

And I don't just write them down.

I allow myself to expand experience being grateful for them.

So when I think about my son, sometimes when he gets home, I can hear him running into my office, you know, and his little feet on the floor.

And I'm like.

And he comes and gives me a hug, and I just feel how good that feels.

Right?

Like, I'm grateful for that.

So you're, like, visualizing it again?

Yes, I'm allowing myself to experience that.

And that does wonders for the mind.

It also does wonders for our hormones and our cortisol levels and all of those things to allow ourselves to experience that gratitude, even at, like, as if it was happening in that moment.

And then I set two goals for myself for that day, to help me stay focused on my future and what's ahead, and then also not to get overwhelmed by all the things I could be doing.

So that part I have, that I'm like, I got two goals.

And then I have evening routines.

So I recommend brain dumping.

So what you do is, in the evening, take five minutes, and if five minutes sounds like too much, tell yourself, I'll do it for one minute.

There's something that happens in the brain when we give ourselves easy tasks, like, okay, well, I'll journal for one minute.

Our brain says, I can do that.

You know, instead of, like, I'll journal for 30 minutes.

Like, that's harder.

So whatever it is, you need to tell yourself, tell yourself that.

And for me, it's five minutes.

And I sit and I write down everything that's on my mind.

It could be my to do list for tomorrow.

It could be something going on with my kids.

It could be work, my parents, my health, you know, things like that.

Whatever it is, write that down and get it all out of your brain and onto a piece of paper.

That really helps neurologically to calm the brain.

So then when you do go to sleep, you're able to get into a deep REM sleep.

I also like binaural beats in the evening, and you wear headphones.

And that's because the music comes into, like, it's different in each ear.

And then the brain mushes it all together, and the brain interprets it as one frequency.

And it really helps the brain to relax and then get into this state of relaxation.

So you can go to sleep very well with that as well.

So those are morning and evening routines.

And.

And then, well, one thing I do throughout the week is on my phone, I have a note, and it's called a capture note.

And when something comes up, like, oh, I need to order this from Amazon, or, oh, I need to get this done for my kids, or, oh, yeah, I need to update that on my landing page, or, I need to do this For a client.

Like all the things that like pop into my brain all the time, I put them into this capture note and there's two times that I'll look at the that capture note in the mornings after I do all my other things, you know.

But as I'm getting into my day, I look at that capture note and see if there's anything that I need to schedule in for the day.

Most things are just things that are were on my brain, right.

But on Sundays, what I do is I take that note and I move things around.

So I'll I have another section in that note where it's like, this is just for later.

Like this is some long term goal that keeps popping in my brain.

Or I'll do this next week.

And then all the things that I can get done this week, I actually schedule it into my calendar that really helps me to be able to be into a state of flow and ease.

So every Sunday I schedule out what I'm going to do for my well being, restoration, what I'm going to do for family things, work, all of that.

I put it onto my calendar and make sure that my calendar is nice and spacious.

It has room for things that may take a little longer than I planned or just life happening, all of those different things.

So those things are really impactful with helping me to avoid burnout and just be able to have more flow and ease.

Yeah, I hear a lot of intentional conversation with yourself, like intentional connection with yourself.

Like that's literally what it, you know, I'm hearing like I'm intentionally connecting to what are my thoughts.

I'm intentionally connecting to what I am thankful for.

I'm like.

Because I think to your point, we're just in a crazy world.

Crazy world.

We're doing lots of things all of the time.

Right.

And it's so easy to get be just like on the go.

And that's part of what fosters the environment, I guess you would say, for burnout because we are just constantly moving, moving and going and going.

And I hear you're like, no, we're going to slow it down.

It doesn't have to be forever.

Five minutes.

I started with five minutes.

Wow.

See you.

Yeah.

But I've been a journaler much of my life though.

But I think it's just important to say a number that your brain can say, okay, I can do that.

When a client comes to you, and this is actually based on what you just shared, they are journalers.

They are doing all of the things they're supposed to Do I have heard this from so many people?

I have a gratitude list.

I journal.

I have my, like, focus, whatever.

But I am so burnt out.

What is happening with that?

There could be some other things going on under the surface that we're not really thinking about.

So a lot of the things we've talked about right now have been more connected to that mental, emotional stress, right?

Like, we know life is going to life.

For me, as a functional medicine doctor, I cannot do anything about all the stressors that come at you, but I can help your body to better adapt to stress.

So think about it.

If you were going whitewater rafting, which is not something I enjoy doing, I did it once, not doing again.

But imagine you're going down whitewater rafting and your boat is like hitting the.

Or your raft is hitting the edges, right?

What we want to do is increase your zone of stress resiliency.

So we're widening that river so that when life happens, your body's able to ebb and flow much easier without hitting the edges.

Like, everything's just kind of like knocking you over.

These are some of the tools and techniques to be able to enhance that.

But then also we've got to remove some of the stressors that we can remove some of the things that we can address.

And we look at this in functional medicine through our intake forms and advanced lab testing.

But toxins are really big.

So think about toxins.

There's two forms.

There's biotoxins, and there are environmental toxins.

Biotoxins are living things like mold, fungus, parasites, bacteria, viruses.

They're living things that are inside of your body, and they're pulling on your nutrients.

You might be eating good food, and they're like, this is good.

You know, they need that to survive.

Your iron ferritin parasites feast off from ferritin, which is the stored form of iron that's really important for your energy.

A lot of these toxins disrupt your gut.

Your gut has 10 times the amount of nerves going from your gut to your brain than what leaves out from your entire peripheral nervous system.

So what's going on in your gut really impacts your mood, your focus, your energy, all of those different types of things.

And then there's environmental toxins.

A lot of those mimic estrogen, which is a really important hormone.

But we don't want xenoestrogens because that could throw off our entire ecosystem with how our hormones are.

And that could come from pesticides.

It could come from our skincare products.

And then there's other.

Just Environmental toxins like medications, radiation, emf, all of those types of things, all of those biotoxins and external toxins are stressors on the body.

So your body is responding to that stress.

Just like if you had a, you know, a disagreement with your spouse or there's something frustrating happening at work.

The same hormones that are activating when you feel mental emotional stress are activating when you're experiencing or you have these toxins living inside of your body.

And then there's deficiencies.

Deficiencies could be things like nutrient deficiencies.

So not getting enough protein or good fats, or just lacking your vitamins, minerals, amino acids, antioxidants, and then not getting enough sleep, that's a stressor on the body.

The body's still responding like, whoa, this is stress.

And then also the gut in general.

So if you're not pooping well, you're bloated after you eat, you got diarrhea, any of those types of things, that's letting you know there's disruption in your gut and that's impacting your adrenals, which are your stress hormones, and that weakens your immune system.

So what we want to do is look at a lot of the underlying issues as well that we don't typically always think of as stress, but our body's responding the same way.

So it's so interesting that you started that off by saying we have to look at all of it.

Even though you might be doing all the mindset work around not being burnt out, the gratitude and all those things, if you are not also tapping in and listening to again or finding out what's going on with your body, body, actually you're missing a big portion of it.

So it's not a this or it's a this.

And my question to you though, specifically, especially for those of us living with chronic illness, because I've been myself in so many, I've talked to, it's like you're like doing all of those things.

They're all part of your process to avoid burnout.

I personally have found that even if you are doing all the mindset work that you're experiencing, working through the physical, to me, the physical aspects of the things that you're talking about, the internal, external, toxins, all of these kind of things affect you, but they're also the most mentally taxing aspects of, of figuring it out, like figuring out, does this work?

Figuring out, does that work?

And then on top of that, we decided to be entrepreneurs.

Why are we so crazy, right?

But we chose this life.

We chose this life.

So in that process, where are we finding the happy medium of, like, obviously, just like in business, there's always going to be something to do.

There's always going to be an aspect of something to do.

Even with your health, how do you find that balance, especially if you are in burnout and you're trying to heal and recover?

I think when it comes to, especially the wellness industry.

And this is where I might get on my soapbox a little bit.

We love soapboxes.

You know, it's really important to do the right things at the right time and in the right way.

And there's a lot of things out there that you could be doing.

People jump into intermittent fasting or coffee bomb teas and coffees and cold plunging and like all these kind of crazy things or even different detoxes.

And I think that is really important to work with someone who can guide you so that you're not feeling overwhelmed by all the things you could do.

And you're actually doing things that will work for your body and with your body for the season that you're in.

There's a lot out there.

So I think also sometimes people can be working with practitioners who are overwhelming their systems or giving them too much to do.

I think I believe in baby steps because it's.

It's a journey.

It's a journey of a thousand, you know, however they say a thousand miles, a million steps, you know, it's a lot.

So it's really important to almost titrate, move things in and do it in a systematic way, too.

Like, don't just.

If you saw someone on TikTok saying, this is going to help with this.

Don't, don't do it.

And you know, and it might.

Might have helped this person or your friend, but it was like that was the one thing that they needed.

When you really.

I'm a big advocate of test, don't guess.

There's a lot of really advanced lab testing out there that can really help you hone in on exactly what you need to be focused on first.

That's what I recommend with that.

I hear you on that.

I also think we'd be remiss not to talk about AI in this season.

I've recently been seeing some ads.

Recently is like, yeah, if you're a health coach or something, this or whatever, like your clients are getting their personalized problem solved by AI.

And I thought to myself, that is all dependent on what they told AI is what they're getting.

They don't even know to the Point, we don't even know what we don't know know.

So what you're telling AI is only telling you what you are able to know to tell it, to give you responses back.

Right.

I wonder how that adds to this conversation of burnout.

Right.

Because we feel like we have this tool that can support us and help us so quickly.

But could it also be adding to some of the, the issues that we see when it comes to burnout?

AI has existed for a, a really long time before they released it out to us in the, you know, as common folk and, you know, so about three years or so ago it came out.

And remember, you go into chat GPT and then you put something in, you're like, oh, this is good.

You know it.

And now, like you can look at something and you're like, oh, AI did that.

You almost look at it with disgust a little bit like, because when it comes out, whatever it generates it initially, especially if you're not well versed in whatever the topic is, it sounds good.

It's like, this makes sense, you know, it, it sounds really, really good.

You've got to be careful with it, with really everything.

But especially with your health, like you said, AI is not seeing the complete picture of what's going on.

AI might just be pulling as well, just from conventional medicine as well, which isn't looking at the root cause of these issues.

Not able to get a full picture.

And it just makes things up too.

I would be very cautious with that.

And for myself, I love AI.

We use that in my business and a lot of different realms.

I spend a lot of time correcting AI.

And then it's like, it's like, I'm sorry, you're right to call me out,.

You know.

Absolutely.

No, I've experienced that as well.

Yes, you're not wrong.

Yeah, yeah.

So when I say what's a step?

And I want to acknowledge that everyone's step is going to be different depending on where they are in this process and what your circumstances are.

I never believe there's a one size fits all to any health stuff ever, especially for women.

Even more so for women than it is for men.

Right.

But if someone is in the space of like, I know I'm burnt out, Alicia.

I know I am burnt out, Alicia.

Like, I know that I'm also like actively working on trying to get more rest.

I'm actively trying to calm my mind in time so I can really connect in, but I can't seem to feel like I'm out of it or moving through it.

What would be your steps or suggestions to them?

When we're burnt out, we're kind of just pushing through.

You know, the quality of work that we're putting out, it may be good.

And I mean, a lot of us were really programmed for excellence.

So it still may look pretty good.

Yeah, I mean, let's, let's.

Let's just break it for a second.

Let's break it for a second.

Let's just break it for real.

The real talk.

As women of color.

Yeah.

We know how to make pushing through look like it's the.

It is extreme extraordinaire.

People are looking like, oh, my gosh, you are superwoman.

You are the bomb.

You keep doing that.

You are awesome.

And we're over there in the closet wishing someone would please take this from me for like five seconds.

This is really the nitty of this conversation is that we are living within the condition of Pushing through is how we get what we get.

Pushing through is how we are received as, you know, we know what we doing.

But we are also the highest leading in autoimmune disorders, depression, heart disease, all of the things.

So we might be pushing through all fine and good until we're not.

You know, Nick Cannon says, and he might.

He might not be the only person that says this, but you have a thousand problems.

Until you have a health problem, then you got one problem, you know, that becomes our sole focus.

A lot of times, especially when it's, you know, something that's very jolting and it's like, okay, I've got to address this.

Like you said, I've got my appointments, I've got all these different things to go.

And we don't really want to push our bodies to that point or where we relapse, for lack of a better word.

You know, especially for those of us that have dealt with chronic illness where it's like, okay, I know I cannot push my body to these levels or I completely collapse, right?

And there's a part of us, or maybe a part of me may relate, where we have to allow ourselves to slow down enough to ask ourselves the question and listen to the answer of, what if it did fall apart?

What if I didn't get it done?

You know, and allow ourselves to kind of be with that.

And sometimes the answer on the other side of that is this.

Okay, you know?

You know, it's not always as, like, dramatic or what's going on in our mind of, like, we've got to do all of this, you know, like, what if I only Got half of my to do list done this week.

Well, what if today I took today off and I didn't get any of those things done and just allowing ourselves to be with, you know what that answer is.

I guess it comes down to slowing down.

You know, it all just really goes back and like, because it's just for me, I, I have a very internal guiding compass that always reminds me that all things are working out for my good and I have to pause and like, do I really believe that?

Am I really that self righteous enough to believe that like everything being held together depends on me, you know, so even in my business, with my team, my family, that's where that trust comes in to allow other people to show up.

And sometimes it is.

It's.

It may not be that I just didn't get anything done today.

It may be that I asked for help, you know, it may be that I delegated something and getting that support that I need.

That question is a hard question.

I've been asked that question in therapy and I'm like, I don't want to think about it.

Like, let's be real, I don't, I don't want to think about it.

And then when you do, though, it is ironic how I was just like in the big scheme of things it's just like, it'll be fine.

Like it really will be fine.

There's only a handful of times where it's like, no, that won't be fine, but the majority is absolutely going to be fine.

The only thing that's not fine is maybe how I personally believe I'm going to be perceived because I didn't do this.

It's a lot more like thoughts around judgment.

A lot more thoughts around like how I'm going to look to someone else if I don't do this thing.

And they are not living in my body.

And that's the truth.

I have to find my integrity in is like, even if they think I'm the most laziest, self centered, flaky person, I know this enough about myself that I'm not.

But this is a thing I have to do.

For me, they should not override what I need.

That is such an important point of like our concerns about how we appear to other people.

I had a summit earlier this year.

I had over 70 speakers and I interviewed almost all of them.

The other ones did presentations and we were finishing everything up the year before.

It was in February when the summit.

So I was trying to get everything done before Christmas and I ended up, I had A miscarriage.

And I was at the end of my first trimester, and I had probably 15 interviews scheduled on my calendar.

Oh, Elise.

Yeah, I'm first.

I'm so sorry.

I feel like it's always a healing journey, you know, with it.

Like, I feel like my miscarriage was, like, the last piece, because I have a book coming out called Worthy of Rest.

And it was like, the last piece that needed to, like, shake that off from me, you know, so I could fully embody the work.

And it was so hard to cancel those sessions with people.

Like, in my mind, I was just like, why can't I just, like, pull it together?

You know?

But the crazy part that happened and the way life orchestrated itself during that time was my mother was in town, and I was up in my room and I was, like, cleaning some stuff up.

You know, I was tired.

I was still in the.

The thing with this miscarriage is it was one where it's a mis.

Miscarriage where your body doesn't recognize that you're not pregnant anymore.

So I was still in my first trimester.

I'm tired, exhausted.

First trimester, so hard on me.

You know, I was just tired all the time.

Like, I just literally, really, really wanted to sleep.

And then it's like, I know that the pregnancy isn't viable, but my body hasn't recognized it yet.

So it's like this weird space of being pregnant but not pregnant.

Yeah, it's a.

It's a whole mind, like, game that's going on.

So, you know, I'm feeling down about it as well.

And my mother's in my room, and bless her heart, she's like, what's going on with you, Alicia?

She's like, why aren't you happy?

She's like, what's going on?

I don't get it.

You just kind of been moping around, and I'm like, mom, I'm having a miscarriage.

And she just kind of dismissed it completely, you know, and we have since worked through this, but it was something that was needed.

It was kind of a whole collision that happened after that, because it was like my last kind of like, mom, you can't do this.

You can't tell me.

You cannot tell me to be happy when I'm sad.

Like, it is okay for me to be sad.

It is okay for me to grieve.

It is okay for me to be tired.

And that was coming from, like, the woman who gave birth to me, you know, that should be giving me the most permission to just be me.

And I had that going on with my mom.

And at the same time, I'm not wanting to cancel these because in my mind, I'm thinking I got to push.

I'm.

I'm literally been programmed since birth to push through, you know, and that's the way my entire childhood was of just, like, you got to be happy, you got to stay on.

And in the real time, like, real.

Time, I'm in my 40s, you know, I'm not 15 years old or 18 years old, where she's telling me to put a smile on my face or stuff, my emotions, you know, and it's like, I just believe everything works out for our good.

I know I've said that, but it.

It was a moment that was needed for me to kind of step into, like, my full womanhood, of this, of, like, in my full autonomy.

And the beautiful thing is, is that I reached out to all of the people I had meetings scheduled with, let them know, and they were all so gracious.

And I know that sounds weird, because you.

You're probably like, yeah, I would totally.

But in my mind, I was like, no, I can't.

I gotta just get this done.

Like, I don't want to cancel on someone, you know?

And some of these weren't scheduled for, like, the next week.

It was a good experience for me to be held and acknowledge and seen and, like, being okay with not having it all together.

This is why I have tissue next to me every time I do these requests.

Alicia, first of all, again, I am so sorry.

I can't imagine.

And also, I can relate in a lot of different ways to you knowing what you need, and then the external world that is so close to you, not acknowledging and allowing space, the safety to be in that space.

It's a thing.

It's a thing.

And I think it's powerful, though, that you see it from this angle of you needed this to realize, oh, the way I've been living is actually making it seem like this is okay in this moment.

It's not.

And I can't be okay with this.

I'm not okay with this.

And I think that's what hap.

I think it's.

You know, unfortunately, I think we all have times where we're like, when it's hard times, we're mad that this hard times, and we're upset that it's happening.

Can't believe it.

And I know for myself, personally, I have been like, oh, I needed to see it like that, to have this shift go off in my head that I can't Live with that type of stress in my life.

I can't accept that type of relationship in my life, no matter who you are.

Like, I need to set boundaries.

I need to do all these things because I can't imagine being 60 and 70, dealing with this with anybody else.

Right.

So, like, it's just like, I'm a grown woman and I feel you on that.

I feel you grown up full.

Grown up, full.

And.

Yeah.

So.

Oh, wow.

I hope that serves someone.

Just to be like, if you are in a hard place, you are in a challenging space and you're trying to do the hard thing, which is already hard.

So it's like, if your mom wasn't even there, just to be like, I have to now call these women and tell them, I can't do that.

It was hard already.

That was just extra hard on the hard.

Right.

And then to have it reinforced, like, no, maybe I am crazy for not pushing through this.

Like, there's lots of thoughts going on, girl.

We could talk about that alone.

Wait, what is happening here?

Is this the why I am, the way that I am?

The realization, the aha moment of being like, whoa, no, Right.

Yeah, but this is part of the work, right?

This is part of the work of healing from burnout.

It's not just rest.

It's also finding those external stressors.

Also the conditioning we don't even know we have.

And it's generational.

It's not like my mom started it, you know, it's my grandma, my grandma's grandma, you know, it's.

It's generations.

And for a lot of us, we're the first to even begin this type of work, to change the trajectory of, like, what it is for our children and our children's children.

Yeah.

You know, you work with a lot of high leaders, high performing leaders in your space who are trained or conditioned in this idea, especially if you're coming from corporate or if they are in corporate, of this pushing through.

How do you help them to see that rest and boundaries as a strategy is not weakness?

We have to realize that there's part of us that doesn't even feel safe resting.

It takes courage to be able to do that, to give ourselves what we need.

And then also recognize, like, I may need to process through, like, actually feeling safe, not doing it all, not getting it all done or resting.

And, you know, and then also with rest, you know, rest isn't always the bubble baths and getting our nails done or a massage, but really giving ourselves what we need.

It takes courage.

So true.

Courage is Huge.

All right, love.

We have talked about so many things, and I appreciate you.

I know we went lots of different.

Directions, but I think it all connects back to one connection with yourself.

Reconnecting, leaning in, knowing that this is going to look a lot of different ways for you specifically, and getting support for you specifically.

So important.

And although it might be hard and difficult, from what I'm hearing you say, there are things that come out there that helps you reclaim and heal from burnout that maybe is taking a different angle of looking at that.

Like, what did I learn from this?

What did I.

What learnings realization happened here that I realized I no longer choose or I get to choose?

I think that's what it is.

Even that incident with my mother, where it's like the stake in the ground, like.

Like we're never going back that way.

It's.

When it comes to our lives and when we think about just how short life is and, you know, blink of an eye, people are here one day and gone the next, it's like one we really can take on, especially as entrepreneurs who we're.

We've created our own business.

Like, we get to have a say in our lives and what we create, you know, we get to choose.

And I think it really is just like really putting that on and embodying that, that we get to say we get to choose and we can truly create lives that we love.

I love that.

So I asked one question before we end, and it is about your personal business.

Like this.

Let's talk about this business you have right now.

What is something that you believe was true before you began it, that you no longer believe is true?

That I have to do it all.

I had a feeling that might have been it.

Yeah, I was.

I was doing it all.

And it's so nice.

I have an amazing team and people that help me and support me.

And sometimes I'd look and I'm just like, they're like, so on board with the mission.

Like, it's just cool to think about that.

And I never completely saw that for myself.

I'd go to conferences and someone might have like a, you know, an assistant with them and, you know, like, someone who's like.

I'm like, wow, how does that happen?

And to now have just such amazing people on my team who are just on board with helping women to be able to heal their wombs and their lives, you know, so they can be powerful in all areas.

It's just so incredible.

That's amazing.

Well, thank you so much.

Please tell us how everyone can find you.

Of course we're going to have everything in the show notes and in our email and our community, but please tell us online, where can we find you?

Yes.

So my website is Dr. Alicia newsome.com you can also just google me, my all my social media, Instagram, LinkedIn, TikTok, YouTube.

It's just my name Dr. Alicia newsome.com also I have a free gift for you is www.

Dr. Aliciagifts.com and that is an energy guide for stress resiliency.

So energy management's got a lot of cool tips and strategies in there for you.

Love that.

We'll definitely have that in the show notes.

Thank you so much again, Alicia.

Thank you.

That's a wrap for this episode of Business with Chronic Illness.

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