WEBVTT
00:00:04.129 --> 00:00:11.653
Welcome to Business with Chronic Illness, the globally ranked podcast for women living with chronic illness who want to start and grow a business online.
00:00:11.653 --> 00:00:12.858
I'm your host.
00:00:12.858 --> 00:00:23.565
Nikita Williams and I went from living a normal life to all of a sudden being in constant pain, with no answers to being diagnosed with multiple chronic illnesses and trying to make a livable income.
00:00:23.565 --> 00:00:33.668
I faced the challenge of adapting traditional business advice to fit my unique circumstances with chronic illness, feeling frustrated and more burned out than I already was.
00:00:33.668 --> 00:00:48.371
While managing my chronic illness to becoming an award-winning coach with a flexible, sustainable online coaching business, I found the surprisingly simple steps to starting and growing a profitable business without compromising my health or my peace.
00:00:48.371 --> 00:00:52.850
Since then, I've helped dozens of women just like you learn how to do the same.
00:00:52.850 --> 00:00:58.893
If you're ready to create a thriving business that aligns with your lifestyle and well-being, you're in the right place.
00:00:58.893 --> 00:01:04.612
Together, we're shifting the narrative of what's possible for women with chronic illness and how we make a living.
00:01:18.579 --> 00:01:19.804
This is Business with Chronic Illness.
00:01:19.804 --> 00:01:23.072
I am so excited that today we are going to be talking about confidence and how we can do that through action.
00:01:23.072 --> 00:01:25.280
How does that look like and how we can do that through action.
00:01:25.280 --> 00:01:29.486
How does that look like and how that can be a challenge for us living with chronic illness?
00:01:29.486 --> 00:01:46.862
And I get to have this wonderful conversation with a really good friend of mine, janina, and I'm excited to invite her to the show and I'll tell you a little bit more about her and she'll tell you a little bit more about herself, but first I want to ask her what does confidence mean to?
00:01:46.923 --> 00:01:48.424
you yeah.
00:01:48.424 --> 00:02:00.587
So it means doing in order to understand that you can do, and then that leads to more doing.
00:02:00.587 --> 00:02:03.292
I like that.
00:02:03.852 --> 00:02:05.075
Yeah, I like that.
00:02:05.075 --> 00:02:20.348
You know, one of the things I think with confidence to your point that you're saying is I know that for me and for a lot of the people we talk to, like the confidence to act in itself is the hurdle right.
00:02:20.348 --> 00:02:36.209
Like, like the confidence to feel like you can do it, Like you can pull the lever, that you don't have to be perfect, which we'll talk about a little bit too, about perfectionism and being confident and overcoming perfectionism.
00:02:36.209 --> 00:02:50.627
How have you found that, just before you even get to the acting part, where do you build the confidence in your brain to even be thinking you can act?
00:02:50.627 --> 00:02:53.156
Because a lot of people think like I just can't right.
00:02:53.175 --> 00:03:03.671
A lot of conversations I have is like, well, I just can't I just can't, and I think it has a lot to do with belief, a lot of mindset, but what does that look like from where you see working with folks?
00:03:06.439 --> 00:03:07.965
what does that look like from where you see working with folks?
00:03:07.965 --> 00:03:09.389
Yeah, so for sure, confidence comes from doing right.
00:03:09.389 --> 00:03:09.972
But what to your point?
00:03:09.972 --> 00:03:11.317
How do you even start that?
00:03:11.317 --> 00:03:13.140
How do you even believe?
00:03:13.301 --> 00:03:23.443
So what I do with my clients is I take it a step back and I look backwards and I get them to pull out pen and paper.
00:03:23.443 --> 00:03:36.336
Because if you keep it in your head, you know, yeah, like I listened to a podcast one time and he's like we can do one plus one equals two, right, and two plus two equals four.
00:03:36.336 --> 00:03:43.550
But if you got something like if you got 247 times 43, how many people can do that in their head?
00:03:43.550 --> 00:03:50.748
So why do we try to keep doing things like build confidence and unscramble emotions in our head?
00:03:50.748 --> 00:03:59.813
In our head, yeah Right, pull out paper, pull out paper and we write down all of the things that you have accomplished already.
00:04:00.640 --> 00:04:06.783
And then you pick out the favorite things that you've accomplished already, and this doesn't even have to be related to business.
00:04:06.783 --> 00:04:09.350
What are the things that you've done just in your life?
00:04:09.350 --> 00:04:15.171
And then we write down the list of things that you did to accomplish those things.
00:04:15.171 --> 00:04:21.232
Mm-hmm, and that already shows you that you do have the confidence.
00:04:21.232 --> 00:04:27.781
You do have the will, you do have the motivation already there to move and take action.
00:04:28.862 --> 00:04:31.968
Yeah, totally so true, it is starting.
00:04:31.968 --> 00:04:34.213
It is I like to call it.
00:04:34.213 --> 00:04:35.742
It's like disrupting the lie.
00:04:35.742 --> 00:04:45.781
It's disrupting the lie because there's we wouldn't be standing here or sitting here or lying down in bed, wherever you are listening to this podcast, if you took no action ever like.
00:04:45.781 --> 00:04:54.867
That's just this lie that our brain likes to tell us to make us feel safe in the context of just let's not do anything Right.
00:04:54.867 --> 00:05:03.468
So such a good point, such a good thought of like why, where to go, start back, start backwards.
00:05:03.468 --> 00:05:03.988
I like to.
00:05:03.988 --> 00:05:04.569
It's interesting.
00:05:04.569 --> 00:05:05.973
I call it the confidence card.
00:05:05.973 --> 00:05:18.665
I like have my clients do something similar and it is such a powerful tool because, especially if you look, just looking back at that's like a bomb to your belief system there for a minute to be like yeah right.
00:05:19.600 --> 00:05:32.060
Like you also realize, you did that through a lot of really hard stuff too, right?
00:05:32.060 --> 00:05:32.600
So such a good point.
00:05:32.600 --> 00:05:35.045
So before we go on, I want to just let you guys know a little bit about Janina.
00:05:35.045 --> 00:05:42.004
Janina is like one of the sweetest women I've gotten to meet and it's thanks to her husband I've got to meet her first of all.
00:05:42.004 --> 00:05:46.074
In that way I've gotten to know you guys.
00:05:46.074 --> 00:05:48.047
She is an amazing coach.
00:05:48.047 --> 00:05:53.653
She has been in the world of entrepreneurship for a very long time.
00:05:53.959 --> 00:05:59.827
Me and her kind of started talking about business and things when she was doing bookkeeping and accounting and all of that jazz.
00:06:00.261 --> 00:06:20.533
And she's been around entrepreneurs doing entrepreneur things while also living with many chronic illnesses and her husband lives with chronic illness as well and so she understands, like when we start talking about confidence and I feel like in the context of the entrepreneur world, we do hear a lot about taking action and da, da, da, da.
00:06:20.533 --> 00:06:23.009
And I'm always like, yeah, what about this?
00:06:23.009 --> 00:06:27.771
What about when you are in brain fog and pain?
00:06:27.771 --> 00:06:30.480
What about pulling the lever in those times?
00:06:30.480 --> 00:06:38.100
Because advice that we sometimes hear around like just rest until you feel better yes, that's important, we do need to rest and do those things.
00:06:38.100 --> 00:06:44.170
But if we were to perpetually rest, we would never get anything done outside of resting.
00:06:44.170 --> 00:07:03.653
And so when you talk about this, you talk about this very much from a scientific standpoint of how actions is important and tell us a little bit more about, like, how you came to now doing this more full-time as a coach around confidence and helping those with you know with in their entrepreneur journey.
00:07:04.279 --> 00:07:04.600
Yeah.
00:07:04.600 --> 00:07:10.891
So the reason I'm even here doing this is because the bookkeeping business no longer served my chronic illness.
00:07:10.891 --> 00:07:13.767
We'll just put that one out there.
00:07:13.767 --> 00:07:17.338
I do still have, I know why but yeah, I'll tell you Okay.
00:07:18.259 --> 00:07:20.083
I'll tell you I'm good.
00:07:20.083 --> 00:07:48.613
So when you have the type of business that bookkeeping is, that requires your clients to give you something in order for you to do your job, and if they don't give you those things in order for you to do your job, then that puts you behind and it puts more stress on your body, your mind, all of that trying to make sure that you live up to what you put in your contract saying that you would do.
00:07:48.613 --> 00:07:57.209
And then it messes up the whole schedule of everything that I had and was ready to do, and I thought it was the best thing in the world, especially when I first started.
00:07:57.209 --> 00:08:02.927
But as time went on, you get more clients, which was fine, the workload was fine.
00:08:02.927 --> 00:08:10.064
Clients, which was fine with the workload was fine.
00:08:10.064 --> 00:08:12.007
But the more people you have, the more people don't do what you ask them to do.
00:08:12.007 --> 00:08:19.978
Yeah, and so you know, if I'm not getting receipts by the fifth, I can't give you reports by the 10th, and so I just stopped marketing it.
00:08:19.978 --> 00:08:20.800
That's what happened.
00:08:20.800 --> 00:08:24.226
I just stopped marketing it because I didn't want to do it anymore anyways.
00:08:24.226 --> 00:08:34.322
So I have like two or three clients left and while Chris was in the hospital a couple of years ago when he came home, which you know, incidentally.
00:08:34.322 --> 00:08:38.331
Today I looked on my Facebook memories and today was the day he came home two years ago.
00:08:38.331 --> 00:08:46.267
Oh, wow, yeah, after having surgery and all of that, I still did the bookkeeping work while he was in in the hospital and everything because I could.
00:08:46.267 --> 00:08:49.042
It was it's literally something I could do from my laptop all the time.
00:08:49.784 --> 00:08:52.956
But then we were like, okay, well, what can we do together?
00:08:52.956 --> 00:08:55.624
Like is there something that we can do together?
00:08:55.624 --> 00:08:57.990
Because he does the video, videography and photography?
00:08:57.990 --> 00:09:03.207
Like what can we do online that would help us to be more free together?
00:09:03.207 --> 00:09:07.522
And so, like we started a podcast that only has like a handful of episodes.
00:09:07.522 --> 00:09:26.673
We were going to be like a couple's chronically ill couple relationship, how to have a full, active life thing, which I think we're probably might pick back up at some point, because I started playing with reels and stuff on it again, I've cracked a code on that and I'm so super excited about that.
00:09:26.673 --> 00:09:33.659
But so we looked at like different, like communication type certifications that we could get online.
00:09:33.659 --> 00:09:50.913
And so I got an emotional intelligence certification and Chris, he still hasn't finished it after almost two years his REBT training and that was going to help us help couples to get over the roadblocks and all of that almost two years, his REBT training and that was going to help us help couples to, you know, get over the roadblocks and all of that and feel better while working together.
00:09:50.913 --> 00:09:58.341
Well, since he didn't finish his and I finished mine, I said this stuff is great and I'm going to figure out how to use it.
00:09:58.341 --> 00:10:01.293
And so that's where this business came from.
00:10:01.293 --> 00:10:05.304
It's gone through a few iterations, but it's back to where it started.
00:10:05.365 --> 00:10:07.629
I think at first it was okay.
00:10:07.629 --> 00:10:10.014
Well, you take the emotional intelligence assessment.
00:10:10.014 --> 00:10:11.864
This is where my action comes in, right.
00:10:11.864 --> 00:10:14.591
Like all right, I've got, I'm done with this.
00:10:14.591 --> 00:10:19.126
So I need to figure out how this can help people.
00:10:19.126 --> 00:10:22.533
So I just put it out there online.
00:10:22.533 --> 00:10:23.600
I said I've cause.
00:10:23.600 --> 00:10:25.684
The podcast was already up and running.
00:10:25.684 --> 00:10:29.993
So I said I take the assessment, we'll work together for six weeks.
00:10:29.993 --> 00:10:33.365
That's how I'm going to learn who needs what and how.
00:10:33.365 --> 00:10:37.500
And I got four clients just going hey, this is the stuff I've been learning.
00:10:37.500 --> 00:10:40.504
And they were like, yeah, let's do this.
00:10:40.504 --> 00:10:43.529
So, and I wasn't able to do it on my own schedule.
00:10:43.590 --> 00:10:48.376
even though I still had the bookkeeping business, I was able to have those meetings and everything.
00:10:48.376 --> 00:10:55.152
And by letting people know up front that I have this illness, then they're like okay, if I have to reschedule, then they already know.
00:10:55.152 --> 00:11:04.528
I just am such an advocate for that Like if you have a chronic illness and you have clients, please tell them Yep.
00:11:05.250 --> 00:11:15.390
I have a whole episode I think it's like episode like 10, which is crazy or something like that where I'm like, should you tell people you have a chronic illness, and basically, and then I'm like, yes, Just tell them.
00:11:15.899 --> 00:11:17.486
Most people will understand.
00:11:17.486 --> 00:11:25.900
They will understand more if you go ahead and tell them up front than if you have to cancel, and they're just like well, why them up front?
00:11:25.900 --> 00:11:27.147
Than if you have to cancel, and they're just like well, why?
00:11:27.147 --> 00:11:27.750
Because they don't understand.
00:11:27.750 --> 00:11:30.561
Maybe they don't fully understand anyways, because they don't have chronic illness themselves.
00:11:30.561 --> 00:11:35.441
But if you do tell them I'm still going to do your work, I'm still here with you and for you.
00:11:35.441 --> 00:11:40.033
You let them know, then they're much more likely to be understanding for you.
00:11:41.679 --> 00:11:50.287
So I did that and then I took a course on how to like build my signature, a signature course, and it didn't do as well as I like.
00:11:50.287 --> 00:11:53.989
The principles were great, but I wasn't ready for it.
00:11:53.989 --> 00:12:03.275
I think I don't think that I had done enough in that that one area to have enough information, as much information as I have now.
00:12:03.275 --> 00:12:06.400
But I did end up starting like a membership for self-care.
00:12:06.400 --> 00:12:16.211
It turned into self-care which is even deeper into the mindset, and now it's self-care for chronically ill women with businesses.
00:12:16.211 --> 00:12:23.149
That's what it is, that's what the membership is, and I'm right now in the middle of creating a course.
00:12:23.210 --> 00:12:26.700
Actually, the course is done from the women that have been in the middle of creating a course.
00:12:26.700 --> 00:12:33.950
Actually, the course is done from the women that work that have been in the membership with businesses and they've taken the course and they've given me their feedback and all of that.
00:12:33.950 --> 00:12:38.672
And I'm about to put that out into the world with a webinar and all of that.
00:12:38.672 --> 00:12:43.311
And I'm just like excited because I feel like now I'm where I'm supposed to be.
00:12:43.311 --> 00:12:51.048
Excited because I feel like now I'm where I'm supposed to be Like, but it took me doing several different things to come back to.
00:12:51.048 --> 00:12:53.932
Okay, now this is it.
00:12:53.932 --> 00:12:55.073
Yeah.
00:12:55.894 --> 00:13:01.230
Yeah, yeah, I mean we can have a whole just conversation about that, right, like yeah, like we can.
00:13:01.270 --> 00:13:10.166
I know I went like so far off, but no, I love it because you all know if you're new to the show then you don't know this but the podcast hasn't always been called business with chronic illness.
00:13:10.166 --> 00:13:12.519
It's been something I have been resistant to forever.
00:13:12.519 --> 00:13:27.051
We'll get to that later, but that's the whole, like the evolution, or the yeah, the evolution of so many that I have just come to talk to within the coaching industry.
00:13:27.051 --> 00:13:31.708
So I have done pretty much a similar roadmap as you.
00:13:31.708 --> 00:14:06.474
I mean, when we first met business-wise doing business things, I was teaching you guys how to like make your service provider stuff work and all that kind of stuff, and I was doing my own digital marketing and, like I was doing that as well, and I came across the same roadblock or the same challenge of I'm still in the boat of relying on other people and I don't have control over that and, as someone living with chronic illness, that's not as helpful for me from a mental, physical standpoint.
00:14:06.474 --> 00:14:08.567
So how do I make this work?
00:14:08.567 --> 00:14:28.181
And so this is why you know, of course I'm biased, because now I've been coaching for a while, but this is why I think coaching is like the best thing for anyone living with chronic illness as a business to start with, it allows you this flexibility and it's literally all on your terms, like, literally, like.
00:14:28.181 --> 00:14:41.091
It is one of the most flexible ways of being able to show up and do what you need to do, but most like 99% on your terms, and that's why I love it.
00:14:41.192 --> 00:14:45.686
And so I love that you shared that part of the story, because I think a lot of people have resistance to that thinking.
00:14:45.686 --> 00:14:50.202
They think, well, you know, the service provider is easy People and I'm like it is.
00:14:50.202 --> 00:14:53.932
It's not that the work isn't hard, it's the people, y'all, it's the people.
00:14:53.932 --> 00:14:59.666
It's the people and how they work, and we can't control how people work.
00:14:59.666 --> 00:15:19.072
So we have to control how we work, and the best way I found to your point it has been just offering services like this, where we create the containers and invite people to come into our lane and they can decide whether or not this is what they want to do or not and if they don't have to stay Exactly yeah, yeah, right.
00:15:19.072 --> 00:15:38.866
So, yes, I love that you shared that and I also love that you shared you went through taking a course and then took action to decide how this is going to look, and it took many iterations and I think a lot of us beat ourselves up for something, taking quote unquote many iterations Like there's something wrong with that.
00:15:39.427 --> 00:15:39.589
No.
00:15:40.932 --> 00:15:41.192
Right.
00:15:41.192 --> 00:15:42.841
So let's go back to that.
00:15:42.841 --> 00:15:52.041
Let's talk about that from the contents of confidence iterations, things having to be done over and over again or redone or looking at a little different.
00:15:52.041 --> 00:15:54.386
How does that actually build your confidence?
00:15:54.386 --> 00:16:05.831
How can we reframe this idea of starting and stopping tweaking and going from being like I'm a failure to actually this means I'm moving forward and I'm building this muscle.
00:16:06.559 --> 00:16:13.682
Yeah, that's a great question because we do tend to get stuck when you're not seeing the results that you would like to.
00:16:13.682 --> 00:16:23.591
But first I would like to caution and say if you're not seeing the results immediately, you might have to still just keep going for a little bit.
00:16:23.591 --> 00:16:33.966
Yeah, like I don't advocate stopping without trying your strategy for at least a couple of months, you know because you have to.
00:16:33.966 --> 00:16:38.826
If you're changing something up, your audience has to realize that you're changing something.
00:16:38.846 --> 00:16:40.566
Yeah, so you have to give it time.
00:16:41.059 --> 00:16:46.481
Yeah, you absolutely have to give it time, and there's a part of me that's really impatient.
00:16:46.481 --> 00:16:48.466
I'm just like, oh my goodness, it's not working.
00:16:48.466 --> 00:16:54.654
I'm just going to stop this, you know and it's normal to feel that way, because we do like to have immediate results.
00:16:54.654 --> 00:16:56.042
But stick with it for a little bit.
00:16:56.042 --> 00:17:06.012
If it doesn't work and also if it doesn't feel right to you anymore, then you know, make that change, because you don't.
00:17:06.012 --> 00:17:14.273
You also don't want to continue to do something that doesn't feel good to you anymore as well because your body will tell you.
00:17:15.520 --> 00:17:37.862
And that part is so so, like huge here, because I don't I don't know about you, janina, but I feel like, especially in the context of like coaches and generalized coaching and I say generalized coaching even though there's niche but people who aren't thinking about the body and what we do, that there's a lot of advice that's out there.
00:17:37.862 --> 00:17:41.166
That's saying the counter, the opposite of that, right.
00:17:41.166 --> 00:17:48.653
Like, you don't have to love your business, you don't have to like what you do, you don't have like it, all of these things, right.
00:17:48.653 --> 00:17:52.844
But how does that affect someone living with chronic illness differently?
00:17:53.865 --> 00:17:55.549
Yeah, cause you feel it differently.
00:17:55.549 --> 00:17:59.788
You know, if you don't have a chronic illness, you'll still feel it, but you can work through it.
00:17:59.788 --> 00:18:02.542
You can work past it, you can ignore it.
00:18:02.542 --> 00:18:11.424
But if you have a chronic illness that's causing you to be in bed you know more than all you know it's causing you to flare, you're not enjoying yourself.
00:18:11.424 --> 00:18:17.607
Then what good is that You're not going to make money, which is, you know, part of?
00:18:17.607 --> 00:18:21.847
Yes, you started your business because you love it, you know, because it's something that you want to do.
00:18:21.847 --> 00:18:30.541
You want to.
00:18:30.541 --> 00:18:32.165
That's why I named the course make an impact.
00:18:32.165 --> 00:18:36.174
You want to make an impact, right, you want to do that, but you also do want to make money.
00:18:36.174 --> 00:18:38.059
And you can't do that if you're not having fun, because we feel everything.
00:18:39.500 --> 00:18:41.183
It's like I don't think we.
00:18:41.183 --> 00:18:46.034
I was talking to a client the other day and I was like we dismiss one.
00:18:46.034 --> 00:18:47.445
We most of us dismiss.
00:18:47.445 --> 00:18:56.659
And this also goes back to, like your point of like putting everything down, seeing what you're doing, like making even even beyond, like what you've done in the past.
00:18:56.719 --> 00:19:03.903
Something I have my clients do now is just like, especially ones who have a bit of trouble with confidence of writing things down, like what did you do?
00:19:03.903 --> 00:19:17.646
Like even if it's the smallest thing, of like getting out of the bed and brushing your teeth, because you know there've been times where you didn't do that Okay, like you didn't have the energy to do that.
00:19:17.646 --> 00:19:19.993
But like even the small things, I think we kind of dismiss.
00:19:19.993 --> 00:19:27.701
But we also dismiss the energetic effects of what we are doing, like we don't and how it shows up for us.
00:19:27.701 --> 00:19:33.801
And so to your point yeah, you can't just ignore if you don't like something and you can't just push through it.
00:19:33.801 --> 00:19:34.523
I mean you can.
00:19:34.523 --> 00:19:41.510
It's just going to do more harm than good and you will actually end up losing money because you did that, exactly, exactly.
00:19:41.550 --> 00:19:43.212
And that's why, too, exactly, exactly.
00:19:43.212 --> 00:19:50.815
And that's why, too, I encourage self-care within my container, because it gives you more clarity on how you're actually feeling.
00:19:50.815 --> 00:20:10.818
Because if you're just working and pushing through on something, even if you do enjoy it, if you are pushing through past and through your pain too much, to the point where you're flaring even on something you do enjoy, you're not going to enjoy it.
00:20:10.818 --> 00:20:19.621
So in order to know whether you're actually enjoying it, whether you actually feel aligned with what's going on, you have to step back from it every once in a while.
00:20:20.721 --> 00:20:22.143
You just have to.
00:20:22.603 --> 00:20:25.445
You have to rest in a way that it's called active.
00:20:25.445 --> 00:20:26.546
I call it active rest.
00:20:26.546 --> 00:20:31.329
You have to do something that's not connected to making money.
00:20:31.329 --> 00:20:35.413
You have to do it, Otherwise you're just stuck.
00:20:35.413 --> 00:20:36.934
You will be stuck.
00:20:36.934 --> 00:20:47.040
You'll never know what you really want to do and where you're actually at you're actually at.
00:20:47.060 --> 00:20:52.780
Yeah, so I can hear in the background and in my own mental brain of all of the women that I work with which, the perfectionist head screaming right now Of course.
00:20:54.443 --> 00:20:55.605
But what do you mean?
00:20:55.605 --> 00:20:56.708
Active rest, like?
00:20:56.708 --> 00:21:00.134
What do you mean about taking action?
00:21:00.134 --> 00:21:03.365
Because perfectionists actually are interesting to me.
00:21:03.365 --> 00:21:17.779
They're very fascinating to me because, as much as they're perfectionists, they actually act the least right, they actually take the action the least and to become perfect.
00:21:17.779 --> 00:21:44.284
If we think about this in the context of just learning and how we do in order to reach perfection, as imperfect people, we almost have to keep failing in order to get to the best version of something, and so, if we are in our perfectionist mindset, we literally are not taking the actions that we need to take in order to reach so-called quote unquote, not real, but let's imagine it perfection.
00:21:44.284 --> 00:21:50.229
So how do we address that in this conversation of confidence?
00:21:50.789 --> 00:21:51.971
Yeah, I love that.
00:21:51.971 --> 00:21:58.696
So that procrastination because that's what that is right, that is procrastination.
00:21:58.696 --> 00:22:01.862
It shows up in different forms.
00:22:01.862 --> 00:22:06.432
It doesn't usually show up in the form of doing something that you actually enjoy.
00:22:06.432 --> 00:22:17.515
It shows up in doing other things that you don't, that you've been putting off and that you don't want to do, that are, as you said before, energetically making you tired.
00:22:17.515 --> 00:22:20.342
They're making you feel worse.
00:22:20.923 --> 00:22:34.542
So if you pull back from that and then do like I was saying, with active rest and self-care and that's one of the things that I give in my membership is 25 activities that you can do that take five minutes or less.
00:22:34.542 --> 00:22:56.575
That are just ideas, just ideas, Because for a perfectionist, the hardest thing to do is to figure out what it is that you want to do, Because you've been so long, for so long, figuring out or thinking about how you're going to take care of other people that you don't know what you want to do for yourself anymore, Absolutely.
00:22:56.575 --> 00:23:07.277
So you either are helping other people or you're running yourself in the ground, thinking about the things that you want to do for yourself but not doing them.
00:23:07.277 --> 00:23:13.673
So that's what I heard, that pull back, here's your activities.
00:23:13.673 --> 00:23:16.907
And like I don't know, let me just look at this month.
00:23:17.148 --> 00:23:21.207
Okay, I can just tell you just off what we've got going on this month.
00:23:21.207 --> 00:23:27.529
You know some of the things are energetic, like stand barefoot in the grass, you know, feel the sun on your skin.
00:23:27.529 --> 00:23:40.111
You know there are things that aren't as like in depth, Like most people think of self-care as like get in the bathtub right, Do a face mask, get your nails done, go to a spa.
00:23:40.111 --> 00:23:47.873
While those things are good and are part of self-care if you're sick yeah doing.
00:23:47.992 --> 00:24:01.315
You know, like, yes, I am one of those that needs to get in the bath all the time, like that's what my illness means right, like how I feel about massages, everybody's like massage is so luxury, I mean I, I can be, but I do it because I got to.
00:24:01.536 --> 00:24:02.157
Exactly.
00:24:02.157 --> 00:24:04.590
But then there are things that you can't do.
00:24:04.590 --> 00:24:05.815
That every day, right.
00:24:05.815 --> 00:24:08.011
So what do you do every day?
00:24:08.011 --> 00:24:10.811
So you can declutter?
00:24:10.811 --> 00:24:15.073
Right, you can eat dinner outside.
00:24:15.073 --> 00:24:32.726
List recent personal improvements so not business personal improvements color window, shop birdwatch Take yourself away from what's going on and that will bring you back to okay.
00:24:32.726 --> 00:24:39.105
Now I'm ready to actually do something, because that noise, that perfectionism, is noise.
00:24:39.105 --> 00:24:46.691
It becomes white noise in your head and it's negative self-talk and you've got to get out of your head in order to take action.
00:24:46.691 --> 00:24:48.516
So that's what we do.
00:24:48.516 --> 00:24:49.949
I love it.
00:24:49.949 --> 00:24:54.184
I love it, yeah, and we talk every day about like, like in the membership.
00:24:54.184 --> 00:25:01.471
We talk every day about what you've done, you have to do, you need to do something every day, even if it's just for five minutes for yourself.
00:25:01.912 --> 00:25:04.198
That does not include making money.
00:25:04.198 --> 00:25:06.565
You have to take a break every day.
00:25:07.886 --> 00:25:16.086
Yeah, and you know it's a part of, I like to say, with my clients and with, just in general, just the way I live my life.
00:25:16.086 --> 00:25:26.775
You have to believe that taking time for yourself will benefit you not just like energetically and physically, but also financially.
00:25:26.775 --> 00:25:53.448
Like I think we are, we're conditioned in this world that we live in right now where it's very much like work, eat, sleep, work, Like that's what we do, and so obviously we like, we are craving for the like extravagant, like travel and vacations, because those are all things that, like you get to separate from like working, and then you could explore different things, but it's just for a brief amount of time.
00:25:53.448 --> 00:25:59.098
But there's 365 days of the year, Right, and so we have 24 hours in a day.
00:25:59.098 --> 00:26:02.866
Most of that time is literally dedicated to eat, work and sleep.